Someone had a hell of a start to 2011 if the local playground was anything to go by this morning. A carpet of crushed beer cans and broken glass, a pair of discarded underpants, a human turd and half eaten tray of Ardenne pate. Real classy.

The main drag wasn’t much better with humanity’s passing smeared down its sidewalks in the shape of vomit trails, an upturned office chair on top of the bus stop roof and some unfortunate’s car that looked like a tank has rolled over the top of it. Happy New Year.

 

It’s nice to see in this age of squeaky clean, wheat grass munching thespians a throwback like Charlie Sheen.

Sheen, god bless his Hawaiian print socks, has had numerous run-ins with the law involving ex-wives, guns, cocaine, alcohol and prostitutes as well as starred in some masterful clangers including Navy Seals and Hot Shots: Part Deux.

I’ve got a soft spot for him although I’m sure his former partners are less forgiving.

His latest run-in with the law combined most of the above mentioned debauchery in one uber blow-out that led to his arrest (again). Long may you reign.

 

It never ceases to amaze me of the sheer number of ‘normal’ people working nine-to-five jobs who are absolutely barking. Scratch the surface and you’ll find a bug-eyed loon staring back.

Our recently departed Internet editor is a good example.

I thought I was the sole recipient of his mercurial moods. However, its since come to light that his Dr Jekell/Mr Hyde routine had been liberally applied around the organisation.

A colleague told of getting a lift home with him one night and agreeing to go for a quick drink.

Big mistake.

He downed two bottles of wine to her one glass, told her his personal problems along with his belief that the neighbour had been sexually abusing by his cat.

She said: “He got drunker and drunker and louder and louder. I ended up telling him he was making me feel extremely uncomfortable and left. He even offered to give me a lift home even thought he was pissed.”

The next day she received a grovelling email where he apologised for his behavior and saying he understood if she never wanted to talk to him again.

What a nutter.

He followed this by freaking out our young admin. assistant by turning up drunk at work ranting about the injustices of the world (of which he was the prime victim).

Nothing wrong with lunchtime pint you say? No, there isn’t except it was 10am in the morning.

It’s a crazy world.

© 2011 gruntfarter.co.uk Suffusion theme by Sayontan Sinha